Life is Cheap...

I was saddened to read about the death of a seasonal Wal-Mart employee in Long Island. As he went to open the doors at 5 in the morning, the crowd of 2,000 shoppers created a surge that ended up breaking the doors off of their hinges and sending about 200 people trampling over the 34 year old man.


Not to be outdone, two idiots decided to get into a wild west style shootout at a Toys R Us in Palm Desert, killing each other.


Perhpas I'm getting old, wait, I am getting old, but my sensitivities seem to be getting less calloused to senseless death. I live in Oakland, I get that people die for no good reason, especially here. I get that people die in terrorist attacks because kids grow up brainwashed by fanatical ego-maniacs to think that their "enemies" deserve to die. I guess I'm just fed-up with life being so degraded and cheapened. Life has become a fucking "rollback," "doorbuster" sale, so insignificant that it is being killed by consumerism. Literally.


And let's not forget Abraham Biggs, 19, that killed himself on justin.tv. He took a handful of pills and turned his webcam on, while the online "community" egged him on. Are you serious?


What have we become?

Autumnal sunbathing...

Ahhhh... middle of November... at the beach.

Due to 80 degree weather, the kids and I headed to Fort Cronkhite beach on the Marin Headlands.

I had to remind myself numerous times... amidst my kids happiness, the two dozen surfers, the string bikinis, the frat boys flexing their muscles - I mean playing football... that I was actually in the Bay Area. It was beautiful escapism...

... well it was just beautiful

Christian...

Ok, here comes controversy...


Labels.


Christian. Born-again. Evangelical. Reformed.


Un-christian. Post-christian. Recovering (-ed) christian. Jack-christian. Nu-christian. Post-modern christian. Emerging and emergent christians.


I have struggled with the label of being a "christian" for a little while, but it has definitely raised it's uglier head as of late. I have no shame in publicly disclosing that I believe in something wholly unprovable and potentially ridiculous and naive to some. I am ok with that. I am ok with having differing opinions and standards than other christians. I'm even ok when my faith is called into question, or flat out denied, by other christians due to my beliefs.


The problem comes when I am lumped into the same category as a hateful Fred Phelps (at worst) or a conservative "Evangelical" (at best) because we share the label "christian." I want people to know that we are not all the same, much like not all Muslims are fanatical terrorists.


I want the "left" to embrace me as one of their own, as I am. I want "christians" to embrace my faith even if they disagree with my politics and acceptance of others, much as I accept their faith, in spite of their politics and treatment of those in divergent lifestyles from their own.


Does this mean that I need a new "label"? Well, I'm open to the idea. Or do I need to keep fighting to change the dogmatic ideas in my own religion (I use that word carefully) that I disagree with?


I'm open to ideas....

Thanks Connecticut, Not Arkansas...

Connecticut...

... for some cool architecture, not having a city with more than 150,000 people and allowing same sex couples to marry.

Some of us in the liberal minority in Conservative California applaud you.

Arkansas, on the other hand... well let's create a law the makes it even harder for people to adopt children in need. Let's pass a law that does not let any unmarried person adopt or foster a child. Hmmm... did they just outlaw divorce along with this? WTFF (the first f is for flying)? Ugh... I'm starting be 'down on' the word marriage.

So Mother Teresa herself would not be allowed to adopt or foster a child in backwards-ass Arkansas?

Sometimes I think we need to stop worrying about 'Islamo-fascists' and start worrying about our own home-grown fanatics. I'm less worried about a dirty bomb going off in the Bay Area, than I am about my blog getting shut down when these 'religo-terrorists' get enough signatures to put it on the ballot and the, gulp, vote for it.

Unfortunately I can hear the Religious Right, Neo-Con, Moral Majority, Traditional Values, American Values, Rick Warren, James Dobson, Fred Phelps chant... "Viva la Revolucion"... and it scares me. And yes, The Purpose Driven Rick Warren just got bumped on my list in the same category as hate-monger Fred Phelps.

John 11:35.

Here's the thing that sucks. I want to tell these people to love others, despite their differences, but I'm having a hard time doing that in their direction. So I wear my hypocrisy on my sleeve... I want religions to be "allowed" - to have the right - to preach a message that divides, separates, hurts, or is just plain stupid, but I don't want them, or me, to be able to vote / legislate it. See, the way I see it, the more divisive you are as a group, the less viable you become. Even the KKK had to label Obama a "mulatto" since he is half white... but does anyone even care? Hardly, because the KKK is losing it's status in a larger culture that tries to accept more.

Jesus says to "love you neighbor as yourself," and let me tell you something... I love me. I love me a lot, sometimes too much.

Swearing...

Yes. Swearing.

I had been reading Mark Haddon's "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time" but stopped for about a week, I guess due to the election and what not. It's is a hugely entertaining story of a boy on a path to find something and his interactions along the way... oh, and his own little quirks.

So I start again... the boy is on a train in England and a policeman is trying to get him to leave the train, when suddenly the train doors close and the policeman, realizing that he is now stuck on the train, shouts, "Shitting fuck." Not "fucking shit" or "shit, fuck." I laughed much longer than I should have.

Now, let me inform you that I love swearing. I love how the words get put together and inflected differently. How they can be said with elation, sadness or anger... or just for the fuck of it. In community college (that's as far as I got) we had a whole class on the word "fuck" and all of it's variations.

I enjoy hearing people swear that don't normally partake in this type communication, sometimes even offending themselves (which is sad because it should not be offensive).

Why should it not be offensive, you might ask? Because it is the use of words. Expressive words, but words, none-the-less. Now, let me be clear that I am not advocating the use of words to degrade people, the color of their skin, the lifestyle, etc. I am simply speaking of the words like, but not limited to: fuck, shit, damn, ass and the list goes on.

My argument: The intention of the word "shit" does not change because you say "crap" or "shoot." If someone gasps, or says they are offended by such swearing, it is because they have been taught to be offended.

So, back to "shitting fuck." If you don't find that funny... well, you probably haven't enjoyed reading this fucking post.

Sorry.

Marriage, a clarification...

In reflection of my last rant, I realized that I had missed a very important point...

I think that marriage is beautiful and more, so much more, than a simple contract with the state. I believe that marriage should be a spiritual connection between two people that love each other and want to commit to all of the highs and lows that come with being connected to another being... mind, body and soul.

As far as "traditional values" go, I support the covenant that two people make together, with or without their god or mine. I also support so called "non-traditional" means and methods for commitment and family organization. I support "domestic partnership" (LGBT and straight) if people don't want to married, single parenting, same-sex marriage, adoption regardless of the "structure," surrogate births and probably a slew of other "arrangements." (To all of my critics, no I do not support polygamist cults that abuse children). I support all of these as long as they are done in love. Love of self. Love of the other person in the relationship. Love of the children. Love of their god, if part of the equation.

My wife and I discussed the value or disengenuity of a "traditional" marriage, at one point feeling that the state contract actually made our spiritual covenant more of a legislated, fiduciary contract. We decided to "traditionally" marry out of tradition more than anything else. It was amazing and gorgeous and still is to this day, now with four of us... with kids, not me and three wives... hmmmm... oh, nevermind.



...yes, I used the word 'disengenuity'... and no, I don't know if it's real or not...

Prop 8...

I'm confused. Is there a "separation of church and state," or not really, as long as enough of the church votes?

What is marriage, really? Well, some conservative christians would say that God created marriage, between a male and a female (of course), so that they could then have "legitimate" sex.. you know, that feeling where two "married" people are the closest they can get, as some symbol for how God feels about his relationship with us. Hmmm... minorly creepy to me. To others it might simply be a cultural or religious tradition to "prove" your commitment to another person, symbolized with a ring, a ceremony and anniversaries. Still to others, maybe just a fiduciary contract to protect assets. So again I ask, "What is marriage?"

"Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California." - Prop 8.

If marriage is truly a spiritual contract between two breeding hetero's and their god, then why is the state involved at all? For that matter, why aren't these people fighting for the state to back the fuck off? Let's get Prop 8a on the ballot. No state involvement in a contract with God! (Oh, I forgot about the tax advantages.. but that's another post.)

If marriage is truly a "christian" institution, created by God, then why aren't churches fighting for "christian only" legislation? Why can two Atheists marry? Or two Satanists? Or is that okay, because it's still penis to vagina contact? And we all know that a penis "traditionally" enters the vagina. Right? (bad joke pending: Dick is to vagina as Rick Warren is to pop-culture... pop-culture being the vagina... purpose driven life, my ass)

If marriage is a cultural tradition, then let all "cultures" partake. Hopefully we'll forget about the times when marriage was "traditionally" not allowed between whites and blacks, or mulattoes or Mongolians. Seriously... Mongolians. These were forbidden until the 1930's in California!

If marriage is simply a fiduciary contract, ordained by a judge, stamped and sealed by the state, then... wait a minute. Wait one fucking minute! You mean to tell me that I can take the bus to the county courthouse, fill out some paperwork, say "I do" in front of a judge and the state declares me married? Shit! I've been duped. So have all my "traditional valued" church going friends. I thought marriage was all about God! God must be pissed right now. I mean, He created this perfect union between Adam and Eve, then thousands of years later, not only are monks taking a life of celibacy (heretics), but somewhere along the way Jews and christians stopped requiring people to have faith in God to get married? Now look... non-christian ceremonies. Mixed race couples. People allowed to marry after they've been divorced. Jesus would've rolled over in His tomb... (oh, that one was funny, and no lightning). Or does Jesus really care? I don't think He would let legislation get in the way of loving people in any walk of life. I don't think he would've cared about the legislation in general. But for some reason, the church feels the need to legislate it's morality, just like the Church of England did when white people fled persecution to find a land that would give them freedom. Is this the same moral legislation that led to the Crusades and burning witches at the stake? I hope not.

Domestic partnership laws in California afford the "partner" in a "registered" relationship essentially the same rights as a "married" spouse. So why aren't t-vals (traditional valuists) up in arms over this? Is it really about the legal definition of the word "marriage" as legislated by the state? If so, I hope the Attorney General and the Courts figure it out for us, and grant people their civil rights, just like religious institutions and hate groups are granted their civil rights. Yes, I said them in the same breath. I don't believe they are the same, but sometimes I fear they come awfully close. This issue should not be about the "acceptance" of homosexuality from any religious institution. Churches should be able to preach what they want, as they've always been able to do and should not feel threatened when the state decides to offer the same protection to another group.

I want to believe in a better place... a better state, a better community, a better church, but I think that we have stop legislating our individual moral fortitude on other people.

Side note: Maybe all of this has something to do with men. Straight men. Straight men that are homophobes. Straight men that are disgusted by two men walking hand-in-hand down the street, but whack off to two naked ladies licking each other. See the Henry Adams Study: where 80% of self-described "homophobic" heterosexual men in the study, when wearing a penile gauge, were turned on by homosexual porn, as compared with only 34% of "non-homophobic" heterosexual men. Interesting, to say the least.

I Hope...

Momentous. Historic. Amazing. Amen.

Words mean a lot, but actions mean more. America elected it's first Black President, well a majority of Americans elected him. Barack Hussein Obama. Incredible.

I hope that those who didn't vote for him give him a chance. After all, he is the most righteous candidate we have seen in a while. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, he will be held to a higher standard than any President before him. He will not be allowed to be an idiot like his immediate predecessor. He will have no choice but to make better choices.

I hope his words carry conviction. Conviction enough to fight for the reasons people elected him.

I hope he can teach us to be good leaders by being a good leader.

I hope Christians will be as accepting of Obama as they are of W., based solely on his acceptance of Christ. Remember, Obama said, "I believe in the redemptive death and resurrection of Jesus Christ."

I hope that we will always hope... for something better... a world more accepting, loving and peaceful.

I hope that President Obama will start us on that path.

GOBAMA!

Chaos is...

A few things I have learned... in the past week...

Lies are bad.

Deceit is bad.

The trickle down effect of hurting one person can potentially hurt a lot of people.

Organization is confusing.

Leadership is confusing.

I am not good at showing compassion.

I am not a good caretaker.

Sometimes I am a bull.

Sometimes I think too much.

There are 27 million slaves in the world.

I am lucky.

Change is hard.

Helping is hard.

Pursuit is hard.

Bad, uncomfortable humor makes me laugh.

The heart is deceitful above all things...

I love my wife.

I love my kids.

I love my family.

I love my friends.

There is no burger like a Kuma's burger.

Maui calls my name.

I'll get bin Laden...

"I'll get Osama bin Laden, my friends. I'll get him. I know how to get him... I'll get him no matter what and I know how to do it." - John McCain.

Is "this one" serious? If he really does know how to get bin Laden, then he suddenly became the most unpatriotic maverick I can think of. Obama should've challenged McCain on this immediately.

I think he should be brought up on treason charges and the $20 million reward should go to AIG so that they can really throw a party.

Two side notes... Is healthcare in America a priviledge, a right or a responsibility? McCain's answer: responsibility. Is it me or Mr. McCain that are completely out of touch with how to serve each other? A $700 billion "bailout"... oh, sorry... "rescue", and we can't afford to restructure our healthcare system so that every man, woman and child is treated the same at the hospital?

...and... Ms. Palin doesn't seem to feel that paying taxes is "patriotic." Now, I know that word has been thrown around a lot lately, but let's take a very mediocre approach... if "we" didn't pay taxes, none of these goofballs would even have a job that aloows them to dictate their own power on to us. So do this then make Palin opposed to her own politcal position of power?

Well, tuesday's debate... I tried, I really did, to listen objectively. I didn't get that far.

Why I hate Sigur Ros...

Sigur Ros can go jump off a cliff.

Go back to Iceland, live in your own little world... just stop invading mine.

Why, you ask?

Because they single-handedly ruined every concert I have been to in the past. They raised the bar so high, I'm not sure anyone can come close.

Incomprehensible vocals (in a mix of Icelandic, English and gibberish) that moved me. Playing guitar with a bow all night long. Playing bass with a drumstick. Playing a wind-up music box. A drummer that kicked serious ass. Confetti!

I have always been a fan of Sigur Ros. They're music seems to fit so many occasions, so naturally they'rer always on. I had missed them at the Paramount a couple of years back, so last night's performance was not going to be missed. I felt my eyes well up numerous times, and I couldn't quite figure it out. I'm still not sure what it was... completely. But I can start by saying that it was beautiful.

I turned around, a couple of times, and saw people in different emotional states... some looked ecstatic and worshipful, others intent, almost trying to decipher what they were experiencing and still others looked like they were in some sort of trance, led by some radical cult leader. I think I fit into all of these categories at different parts of the night. The whole time the band was playing I felt... I don't know... lost, I guess. In a good way. I was so lost in the moment. Like I could have been lifted outside of my body.

And then the rain came... at the end of the encore the rain came. To the thunderous crash and crackle of the drums and guitars. The strobes flashing like lightning, electrifying the rain drops as they fell. It was a beautiful sight. I can't wait for it to happen again.

Living in a nucular age

Did Palin just say nucular? Yes. About a dozen times. I thought it had been pretty well debated, and concluded, that the word is nuclear.

Was this an attempt to create new slang? Was it an attempt to look more like a 'six-pack Joe', whatever that is? Or was it just an example of stupidity followed by stubborness? I'm not sure, but I couldn't help feeling like W. and Palin are either related or brainwashed by the same programming team.

Well, gosh darnit, I just don't know.